Teen Mother

"Teen Motherhood"

I was just on the cusp of turning 17 when I gave birth to my first son Brae.  

I was admittedly scared to care for another life but in all retrospect I was completely ready for it.  

Nervous might be a better word :)

Despite those feelings my natural maternal instincts were already telling me I was ready. 

Yes, 16 is young but I had never really felt 16 to be honest.  High school kids my age were in word "egotistical" everything in High school revolved around what big hunky football player liked which cheerleader and the same scenario in different cliques with different people.  I much rather the sound of my baby boy :) 

I have been a mother for four years now and have added two more sweet boys into my family.  The point of this blog is essentially to share my trials of teenage motherhood.  

I had no problem giving up football games for diapers.  I know weird huh? 

I loved my baby boy

I fed him 

Bathed him 

Sung to him 

Cradled him 

laughed with him 

Played with him 

and 

most of all loved him unconditionally 

People would stare at me

No not stare 

Glare!

It made me feel low 

and 

I'm not sure why 

Because I was sure I was the best mother I could be 

Why couldn't they see that?

Because I was 17 and a mother 

One time in a supermarket when Brae was 4 months old I was looking for hair dye for the school musical I was going to be in.  The character required black hair 

I was with my best friend talking about how excited I was I finally got a lead role in the fall musical.  

She asked me "Is this your baby?"

I said yes and I said he was 4 months old.  

She gave me disgusted stare and walked off scoffing "ugh babies having babies what is this world coming too".  

I was hurt and couldn't figure out why she had acted in such an awful manner.  Because I am sure that as I was replying to her question I had admiration for my baby written all over my face.  I recall kind of cooing the response to this question.  

So why was she mean when it was apparent I had loved this little boy with every fiber of my being? 

Simple 

JUDGEMENT 

and it saddened me that someone could be this way when all I held dear to me was my little boy. 

Since that day I have put a veil over Judgement of any sort 

I am not Judgemental and people who Judge me I simply do not see or hear.  

I am a teen mother and although it's not the smartest thing it's my life and I am proud of the way I have raised my son. 

I wouldn't trade my sons for anything 

No matter my age at their times of birth 

I love them 

and will protect them until the end of time 

in body and spirit.